I work with a lot of founders and entrepreneurs, and almost all of them claim to have a problem with being overwhelmed. But the problem behind the problem is that they don’t understand what overwhelm really is, which is why it spirals out of control.

The trap is confusing two separate things: overwhelm and overload.

Overwhelm is a feeling. It’s the internal experience of the mind spinning, of trying to juggle and solve many thoughts all at once and all of it feels incredibly urgent and important, and it feels like you’re fighting a losing battle.

Overload is a circumstance. It’s when capacity doesn’t match requirements. There isn’t enough money in the account. That task will take longer than the time available. The sofa doesn’t fit in that corner.

The myth that keeps overwhelm alive is believing that overload causes it — that that terrible feeling is being ‘caused’ by a circumstance. But it doesn’t work that way. Overwhelm and overload are completely independent variables, only joined together by an unquestioned cultural misunderstanding.

The feeling of overwhelm comes entirely from what we’re thinking in the moment. If we‘re creating a story that there’s too much to do, that we can’t handle it, that we need to try but will fail anyway–we’ll feel overwhelmed! (Have you ever noticed how easy it is to feel overwhelmed sitting alone in a quiet room with nothing that you need to do?)

Overwhelm is, in essence, the feeling of trying to think your way out of a feeling. But the thinking just creates more of the very feeling you’re trying to get rid of. It’s not inevitable–it’s noise.

And chances are there have been many times you’ve faced genuine overload without it being a big deal. You couldn’t afford something, so you didn’t buy it. Something didn’t work, so you moved on. There were too many things to do, so you made trade-offs. Overload, when you don’t overwhelm yourself about it, is simply logistics.

Conflating overwhelm with overload is a mild, culturally-endorsed form of insanity. You end up at war with your experience, thinking you’re fighting circumstances, not realizing you’re chasing your own tail. The bad news is that you’ve been taught to do it, and everyone around you does it too. The good news is that you simply don’t have to.

When you’re overwhelmed, here’s what to do:

Address overwhelm and (potential) overload separately.

First address the overwhelm: See it as overthinking, as noise rather than signal. The feeling comes from the story, not the situation. Don’t believe your thinking when you’re overwhelmed. Give yourself permission to not try to solve anything from this state. Slow down exactly when you’re most tempted to speed up.

Then address the overload: When the feeling eases, or you at least recognize it as feeling not fact, you’ll see the world as it is. You’ll have more awareness, creativity, and common sense. If there is indeed overload to address, you’ll see it. And from this altitude, it looks less like a crisis and more like a puzzle. And perhaps even an opportunity.

When you realize that overwhelm is optional, overload becomes easy.

Michael McDonald :: Transformational Coach :: authenticintegrity.com​
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P.S. Looking for more perspective? Try out The Big Picture inquiry process.